September 24, 2019

Champions League Match Day 1! VAR NONSENSE OF THE DAY Here comes Callejon… Oh my… Penalty! Without wanting to sound like Neymar… VAR! VAR! PENALTY! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! ASSIST OF THE DAY It’s Van Dijk – oh my! Lolrente scores! 2-0! WHAT THE HELL, VIRGIL! If you keep passing like that I’LL HAVE TO SELL YOU TO ARSENAL! Sorry boss… Virgil, perhaps you teach Sadio how to play a striker in like that? WHAT?! Penalty of the day! Hey, let me take this… No But I do cool little skip thing in my run-up… No… But the gaffer said he’s the penalty taker… Who cares what the gaffer says! Agreed! Well how about you let me take it! That’s not a good idea, mate. Trust me… PLEASE No I can’t believe they’re arguing over who takes the penalties I know right. Ha! Amateurs. HAHA! Ross Barkley, more like cRossBARkley! He’s hit the bar again! Tekkers! Tekkers tekkers tekkers! Anti-Climax of the Day BORE-USSIA DORTMUND vs BORECELONA Which had more misses under one roof… …than a sleep-over at John Terry’s house. BEST DRESSED MAN OF THE DAY Now that is a shocking waistcoat… And I should know… I’ve worn a few… PRESS CONFERENCE OF THE DAY The Valencia players after that fantastic win! Ah… looks like they’re still sulking about their manager getting the sack. In Stamford Bridge, the irony. Strike of the Day AJAX LEAD 1-0! VAR! VAR! G-A-Y! G-A-Y! Respect hahaha

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