Articles, Blog

Keith Eats $500 Of Gourmet Cheese

December 5, 2019

– Whether you’re blue or
feeling like the goat, there’s no food as sharp
or as Goud-as cheese. Yes, cheese! The sometimes stinky, very melty, often powerful wedge of moldy milk stuffs. But when presented with a bunch of different
expensive cheeses, how do you know which one you wanna buy? Today, I’m going to figure that out by trying 26 different cheeses, hand-selected by a cheesemonger. Also, all of my guests
today will be women. Also, also, I think
everyone in this video today will be lactose intolerant. (stately music) (energetic rock music) (peaceful music) – My name’s Jason Louis, I’m
a cheesemonger at Bon Vivant in Atwater Village. I’ve been doing this for about 12 years. My job is to make cheese relatable to you. Sometimes people are a little intimidated, they don’t know what to
expect, it smells funny, could be a little bit moist, it can be a little bit hard, it can be a little bit flaky. It can be overwhelming, but
my job is to make that easy. – [Keith] We’re going to
start with the soft cheeses. – [Jason] Our fresher, younger cheeses are softer cheese like a mozzarella, feta, that have high moisture content. – Come on in. Wow, this is so exciting. I never get to eat cheese
because it really fucks me up. But in these videos, like, all
the food fucks me up, right? Like, it’s not good to
eat a bunch of Taco Bell, so it’s not good to be
eating a bunch of cheese, but who cares? (laughs) You don’t come here
because it’s a good idea, you come here ’cause I’m doing it. I’m living the dream. – [Jason] Herni Hutin Brie Couronne. – Brie Couronne with chives. Ah, it smells like a expensive restaurant. Mm, very mild flavor, buttery. Oh, it just tastes like butter. Ooh, oh. Oh. Oh, wow. It is like eating a tablespoon
of the most delicious butter. A little toasted bread, maybe? (laughs) Oh, oh. Oh, and a little honey, why not? Juice from a cow and vomit from a bee, and they work together to create an amazing, amazing flavor. The description of that is pretty gross. It’s only going to get better. Oh my gosh, let’s go the next one. What do we got next? Thank you, Brie. (smooches) – [Jason] Brebirousse d’Argental. – The red sheep! Look at it, it’s like a slime. Oh my god! Oh my god! (laughs) It kind of has a sharpness
like a cheddar might, but it’s so wet. Sticky, stretchy, ice cream texture. It’s really quite complicated, there’s like this brightness,
(angels singing) like acidity or something. Wow, this day is great right now. Thank you, cheese. (smooches) – [Jason] Brillat Savarin
coated with fresh fruit. – This smells like cream cheese, like cheesecake buttercream. Biting into the most delicious
New York cheesecake, oh wow. I feel like when you’re
watching America’s Got Talent, and somebody who you didn’t think was going to sing so well starts singing. You’re like, oh, you’re
so moved by their story. It’s like, moving me to
tears, it’s so delicious. Fucking god, it’s good. It’s fucking nuts right now! I’m living! There’s so much flavor in each bite. The cheeses have been so different. (smooches) So good. – Zimbro.
– Zimbro? – Zimbro, Zimbro. And this is from Portugal?
– Yep. – Shout out to Portugal! Oh, (laughs) I picked it up, look at it! I thought this was going
to be solid, like cheddar, and look at it. This one really is slime. Look at that. Portugal, oh. (light guitar music) Whoa, it’s so confusing. I got a bitterness, oh, and then it’s really
funky bitter at the end. And it touches, like, the
backsides of my tongue. Eh, right there. I think it needs something
equally strong to fight, like an olive. That one needs some serious balance, because this is intense. What’s that bitterness at the end of it? – [Jason] It’s raw sheep milk. – It’s raw sheep milk? – [Jason] Yep. – So it’s not pasteurized?
– Nope. – Oh my gosh, thank
goodness I’m not pregnant. – [Jason] Prefere des Montagnes. – Mm, from the cows of the mountain. The mountain’s favorite. It smells kind of like a cheese
section of a grocery store, that just general cheese smell. It is so different tasting. What should I eat this with? – [Jason] Slap some jam on it. – Jam on it, okay. Luckily I have some June Lady Peach Jam. That’s a good name for jam
if I’ve ever heard one. Oh, that cut the funk of
this cheese this time. I don’t know if the fruit
unlocked it or what, but I don’t know about this one, guys. This one’s challenging me in ways I wasn’t ready to be challenged. It’s got like the funk of a blue cheese, but not the other part of blue cheese. It’s like, just the funk. A little bit footy, a little bit foot. A foot above the rest, let’s say. People like their
different kinds of cheese, but this one, I don’t like it! I think I’ve decided, it’s
to challenging for me. Well, I’ll still kiss it goodbye. Dairy pill break, because we’re about to
have a bunch of brie. – [Jason] Brie aux Truffes. – Whoa, the fucking, what
is the? (laughing loudly) Whoa, look at this! It looks like a giant matzo. So many moms around the country are just like, “I want that.” (laughs) I want that brie at my party. It’s Captain Marvel brie. That brie’s going to
come in and just like, it only comes when it
like, absolutely has to, because that brie’s taking care
of other important matters. Wow, that’s what it looks like? Oh my god, it’s oozing. Oh god, holy shit! – The Brie aux Truffes
is a giant brie wheel that has been layered with creme fraiche, mascarpone, and black truffle. – [Keith] How pricey? – [Jason] Roughly around
$27 on the half pound. – Oh, that’s pretty
pricey for a half a pound. – Yeah, but very much worth it. – Oh my god, you can’t even see it because it’s oozing over itself, but there’s other layers in this brie. I don’t even know how to eat it. It’s so wet. Oh, ah! Oh wow, this is too much. I’m putting way too
much flavor in my mouth. I just took a drop of it. (dramatic music) (coughing lightly) I’m like having an anxiety attack. That’s too much cheese. That’s one of the most intense things I’ve put in my mouth ever. (laughs) And that’s coming from me! Maybe I should wait until I’m older and more of my taste buds have died. If you gave this to a kid, he’d straight up vomit in your face. It is so challenging. That’s it for the softies. Now let’s move to the semi-soft. – [Jason] Semi-soft cheese
are a little bit firmer, still yield a high moisture content. Cheeses with bloomy rinds, washed rinds, typical of brie, Camembert. – Carre du Berry?
– Carre du Berry. From Poitou, France. – Ooh, France. Oh, it smells good! (sniffing) Oh, you know what it smells like? When you’re a child and
you go to the bread place. You’d go in and it smells like
a really good bread place. It smells like a good bread place. It tastes like a really
good Italian olive oil dip at a restaurant for your bread. I’m going to get some of these herbs. Not a ton of them, because
he said I won’t like it. I love it. Oh, fuck yeah. Mm. Oh, oh, oh, oh. This tastes like a Williams-Sonoma. Wow, that is awesome! I want that spread onto bread and served to me every time I have dinner. Back in the day when I
didn’t have any money, and we were drunk, we
couldn’t buy actual food, so we’d just eat spices. We would stand in the kitchen and pour small amounts
of spices into our hands and then just lick our hands. This is kind of like that. Mm, wow! Hot shit coming through! Thank you. (smooches) – [Jason] Prufrock from Martha’s Vineyard. (Keith gasps) – Martha’s Vineyard! I’ve heard my mom talk about that place. It’s got a good gumminess to it. It squishes very nicely. Oh shit, guys, this smells good. I think this would be
tremendous with wine. Oh, I think it is. It’s not my favorite, I do like it. It’s kind of like when you
get all this anticipation, you go to this place that’s supposed to be
really luxurious and nice. You get there and it’s like, raining. Like it’s out of season, like the trees aren’t
blooming yet or something. You’re like, “Oh, I was so excited “to go to Martha’s Vineyard
but it was just okay.” I know Samantha went and
she had a great time, but I went and it was just okay. That’s how I feel about
this cheese. (laughs) I’ve had so much fun eating cheese, but I can’t keep eating cheese alone. It’s time to get some experts in cheese into this taste test, starting with one woman, Kelsey Darragh. (applauding) You want to try this herby cheese? – Yeah. Ooh!
– Right? – Can I have a Lactaid?
– Yes you may. So Kelsey, you love cheese. You’ve made a lot of
content around cheese. You’re a big cheese head, but you like me, are lactose intolerant. – Only with cow’s milk.
– Oh. – I can have goat’s and sheep’s. I don’t know why but
white bitches love cheese. I think it’s because they love wine, and so cheese just pairs
so naturally with it. – But didn’t you love cheese
as a child before you had wine? – Oh yeah. – How early did you have wine? – Pretty early.
– Hmm. – [Jason] Meredith Dairy Marinated Goat. – Also I love how she’s
bathing in olive oil. She lives there. – [Jason] Just dip your
bread in the olive oil. (Kelsey gasps) – Okay, you don’t have to tell me twice. I got a leaf. – Oh, you got an herb! – Should I keep it on there?
– Yeah, why not? – Okay, thanks for inviting me to maybe the best video I’ve done. Wow, what does that taste like? – It is actually unbelievable. – It’s butter. – It’s like a really salty butter. It’s so delicious. It has really good olive oil
that it’s just living in. – I feel like I need to
take advantage of this. – Like expensive steakhouse salt butter. Oh, it’s expensive butter
you’d put on a steak. Kelsey. – Finish it all? I’m sorry. (laughs)
– Kelsey! – It does something to me. It takes over. – I could eat this whole jar. – I might. – We got to take it away from us. – No, leave it! Can I hide it under here? – No, Kelsey.
– Okay, take it. – We have to…
– No, leave it. – [Jason] Mont St. Francis from Indiana. – Indiana?
– Yeah. – [Keith] Hmm. – Now, how do you eat something like this with the crust on it? – You can actually eat the rind. That has been bathed in
Russian Imperial Stout. – Beer, some beer cheese. – A Russian, a stout
Russian emperor. (laughs) (both gasp) It smells very nice. It smells like a hard
cheese, which I like. – It does smell like a hard cheese. – [Jason] How does something smell hard? – It smells hard. (playful music) – It just has a little
tang, a little bitter. Very salt forward. – Oh yeah, this is nice.
– Mm. – You really go through about five flavors
throughout the taste here. – [Kelsey] It starts mild. – [Keith] Then it gets a
little funky for a moment. Then it gets sharp and it’s salty. – What a journey.
– Mm-hmm. – Multifaceted.
– Oh wow! It’s simple, very palatable. It’s lightly complex, so
you could like be like, oh, you like most cheeses, right? Well, you’ll love this even though it’s a little bit challenging. – This is an everybody cheese. Can someone make me into
a cheese when I die? – I don’t know if it works like that. – You could make cheese out of your breast milk
if you ever had that. – I don’t know if I– – I’m not suggesting you do, I’m just saying your options are open. – [Jason] Le Brebis de Wavreumont. It means sheep, it’s the
sheep of Wauvreumont. – Whoa, it is! (laughs) – That, no joke, any cat
owner will know this smell. It smells exactly like a fresh cat shit. – The little stuff that
gets under your toe nails. (Kelsey groans) If you’ve ever smelled that because you’re a curious
12 year old, that is that. – You liked the Red Sheep.
– Right. – It’s the same thing.
– Oh my god, you’re so right. I’m judging a cheese before I try it. – Let’s start, let’s start small here. – Small, okay, ready? One, two, three. It tastes how it smells. – [Jason] Put a little jam on it. – I love cheese, but this is too much. – This is a challenging cheese. The only things we’ve
described it with so far have been fecal matter and dead skin. – Oh no, it just tastes
so much like it smells. – Yeah, no, I taste it now. – Yeah.
– I can’t handle it! Wow, whoa! That’s not a good cheese. – [Jason] Humboldt Fog. – [Kelsey] One of my favorites. – Everybody loves this and it’s great, you can get it anywhere,
and that’s why I have it. It’s just one of those like, oh no. – Because basic bitches love it? Oh yeah. – Right, it looks like it’s going to be super
complicated and funky, but it’s actually pretty mild funk. – It kind of smells like Cool Whip. – [Both] Cheers. – To cheese. Mm, that is creamy.
– Very comforting. – Super palatable. – Close your eyes, Kelsey. What’s this make you think of? – This makes me think of… (twinkling music) Like a river afternoon, where you’re close to the river, you know? – That’s not how I would’ve described it, but I gave you the mic,
so that’s how it is. – Paint me a picture. – [Keith] I walk into
an empty living room. – [Kelsey] Oh Jesus. – There’s a plate of cheese on the table. I look around, I see that there’s clearly been
a party in this living room. I wasn’t invited, but look, now I get to eat all that’s left over. It’s all for me, how lovely. (Keith gasps) Jeez, you ate so much of it. – No, I didn’t. – Why’d you do that to yourself? – You weren’t looking. – It’s going to hurt you. – Now I’m satisfied. – Well good, because
it’s time for you to go. – I don’t want to, but I will. – Thanks for dropping by. Check out Kelsey Darragh’s podcast Confidently Insecure on YouTube. – Thanks for the plug. – You got it, girl.
– Bye! – Bye! Well, the soft days are over. Now it’s time to get semi-hard. I know, I didn’t know
how to introduce that, but I’m still going to
get the hard cheese later. Bring on the semi-hard, please. – [Jason] Semi-hard cheeses
are cheeses that are firmer, yet still retain a little
bit of the moisture. They have sometimes holes. They are aged for roughly
about six to 12 months. Meloussa Mahon from Majorca, Spain. Espana.
– Spain. It smells kind of like a cheese cracker. Mm, that’s the texture I’m into. Kind of like a cheese cracker, but like a really
delicious cheese cracker. Mm, it’s like looking
out at a bunch of cows, and all the cows looking back at you. Then you see there’s
sheep next to those cows. You see some goats next to those sheep. Everybody’s staring at you. It’s like being watched by mammals. – [Jason] Esquirrou, 2018 World Champion. – [Keith] World champion cheese! – There’s a World Cheese Contest, this bested out of 3,300
entries from 26 countries. This got World Champion. – I’m in the presence of greatness. It smells like a winner! Oh, it’s bizarre. It’s got a very muted flavor. I liked other cheeses better. Maybe the jam will swap my opinions. Maybe I’m just like, getting
desensitized to cheese. It’s too much cheese all at once. I’m starting to feel a little crazy. I like it. I don’t know if I would’ve given it the world championship title. Oh, that goat cheese in a jar. That cheese should be
the best in the world! This can be fourth place. It’s time to bring in some more ladies. That’s right, who loves cheese? Ladies love cheese. Please welcome to the stage
table, Becky and Lauren. (applauding) Becky you all know as my lovely wife, but we don’t know who Lauren is. Lauren, introduce
yourself, what do you do? – I eat cheese, actually, so
this really in my wheelhouse. – Becky and Lauren often have
wine and cheese sort of dates. – Keith deprives me at home of cheese. I have to go with friends. – Kaaslust Quattro. It’s a rare cheese. It’s made from four milks. You’ve got goat, sheep, cow, and buffalo. – Noah’s Ark, like all the Power Rangers combine the animals together
and they have one super. – With all our cheese
combined, we are the Quattro. – The Quattro, I feel like they all just
canceled each other out. – Yeah, I was like, I don’t
even taste any goat or sheep. – [Jason] It’s really harmonious. – It’s a fine cheese. I wouldn’t say it’s a good cheese though. – I think it’s actually very good. In fact, the second piece I had really melts in the back of
the tongue really nicely. It has a little bit of a sweetness to it. – It tastes good with the nut. – All right, close your eyes. – It reminds me of something
I would eat in high school. You know what I mean?
– Huh, what high school? – You eat weird things in high school, and you’re like, “Oh,
this is really good.” But then it’s not that good. – [Jason] Flor d’Esgueva. Spanish, aged seven
months, raw sheep’s milk. – Oh, I actually do like that one. – Kind of funky.
– Ooh, it’s creamy. – It’s bitter, right? On the top of your tongue. – Yeah, you’re like, “Oh.” it’s a little dangerous. Living life on the
edge, guys, this cheese. – I like raw cheese.
– It’s kind of gamey. – Oh, gamey. Raw cheese is good, where
do you get raw cheese? – Ooh, is this from a sheep? Is it raw, honey? Honey?
– Mm. – Is it good?
– Oh. – Oh yeah.
– Mm yeah. (laughing) – All right. – [Jason] Inanna al Vino. It’s been named after the Sumerian goddess of fertility, love and– – Sex cheese! – [Lauren] Sex cheese. – Let’s all have a
little bit of sex cheese. Ooh, it’s hard. Oh, it’s so hard. Mm, I like this. It’s mild.
– Wow. – It’s got a great texture. It’s hard without too much granulation. – Kind of like earthy too. – That is a good party cheese. – I still think I like
the raw one the best. – Yeah?
– The second one. – I like this one actually. – I mean, it’s simple, pleasing. – The tiniest bit of
funk right at the end, just on the rind, I think. – But not like a dirty.
– Like a dirty little rind. – Dirty little rind. – Dirty little rind, this hard
little sex cheese goddess. Dirty rind! (laughs) – Oh my god. – [Jason] Snowdonia Ruby mist. – It feels nice and spongy soft. Oh shit.
– This is good. – This is good! – Oh, I get fucked up on that one. – I think you actually
would get fucked up on this. It tastes like wine. – It tastes like you chugged wine, and then threw some cheese in your mouth. – That’s a dream. – Snowdonia Ruby Mist.
– Snowdonia. – It really sounds like
a whole fantasy series, like the Chronicles of Snowdonia. The Adventures in the Ruby Mist. We’ll go and get the cheese,
all the way into the Ruby Mist! Or else the world is going
to end for Snowdonia. (dramatic music) Wow, I really wish I could
make Snowdonia jokes all day. Ladies, thank you so much for trying some of these
semi-hard cheeses with me. Okay bye! – Okay, see ya.
– Bye bye. – See ya. – You can take your wine if you want. – Girl.
– Take this and head out. – Enough of the semi-hard stuff, let’s bring on the good, hard cheese. – [Jason] Hard cheeses, those are cheeses like
you typically would grate. Firmer, flaky, saltier, crumbly. They go great on top of
pastas, on top of a salad. Barber’s 1833. – I love sharp cheddar. I want it to be so sharp
my tongue is bleeding. Like I want to get in the
Guinness Book of World Records for how sharp it is and I still ate it. Oh yeah, nice chew. Nice creaminess, really good cheddar. Oh, I wish I had this
on a roast beef sandwich with some fucking horseradish. You know what I’m talking about? I’m starting to feel real crazy. My stomach is almost entirely like a little volcano of cheese right now. Get it together, Keith! Okay. – [Jason] Cinerino,
sheep’s milk from Italy. – Ooh, Italian sheep, romantic sheep. (groans) – [Jason] It’s coated in
the ash of myrtle trees. – I’m sorry, it’s coated in
the ash of murdered trees? – [Jason] Myrtle. – Myrtle trees, but they’re
murdered because they are ash. – [Jason] Yeah. – So wow, all trees are murdered. (dramatic music) I am learning that the lamb
cheese has a certain funk to it, especially when it’s raw, but I can smell the funk in this one even though it’s not raw. Mm, it has that buttery taste, but a texture that’s obviously not butter, because it’s harder. This little part by the rind
where it’s a little darker. The flavor is like times five. If you want to fall in love, you and your date need this cheese because it is romantic cheese. It’s salty, it’s delicious. You could have conversations over it. What kind of books do you like? (laughs) Me too. But before we get to the next cheese, we have to bring in our next cheese lover. Another woman who loves cheese even though it only does
bad, bad things to her, (laughs) please welcome to the
table stage, Grace Helbig. Yeah! (cheering) – Cheers.
– Hey, cheers. Thanks for joining me. – Thank you for having me for the one food that hurts my body more than
all the others. (laughs) – [Jason] Vintage Gouda. – Look at the fucking size of that! (Grace laughs) Jesus God! – This is only half of it.
– Half of it? – Yeah.
– That’s what she said. – [Both] Oh! – [Grace] This is too nice. – [Keith] Oh, it’s right
in the, right in the belly. – [Jason] See how nicely it crumbles? – Oh, it crumbles.
– Wow! – Oh.
– Wow. It smells like– – It smells like buffalo wings. You’re full at Buffalo Wild Wings and you’re smelling your hands. – It’s really good!
– It’s sharp. – It is sharp and it’s dry. It tastes like eating a mild wing with just a little bit of ranch on it. I went to Buffalo Wild
Wings not too long ago. – Same, same, same.
– So like I know, really? (Grace laughs) – [Jason] El Trigal. – It looks like a
holographic Pokemon card. I doesn’t have that foil sheen to it, like a special Magic: The Gathering, or Pokemon, or Yu-Gi-Oh! Card, depending on which kind of nerd you were. – [Both] Cheese! – [Keith] The texture’s
like chewing on candle wax. – A really fun piece
of rubber for a second, and then it gets really flavorful. – [Keith] The flavor at first
seems a little watered down, and then you’re like, “Oh no, there’s something
in this plastic.” – Yeah, it’s like when you
meet someone at a party, and they seem really boring,
and then all of a sudden they start having a couple
more drinks and they open up about their whole life
story and you’re like, “Wow, you have so much
more flavor to you.” I like this though. I think it’s subtle. – [Jason] Sbrinz. – Wow you, wow, that’s huge. – Really nice, delicate.
– Yeah, thin. – [Grace] Wow! – [Keith] And it’s really
hard to want it really thin. – Yeah, this is just a quarter. The entire wheel is probably this big and can weigh
well over 100 pounds. – [Keith] Wow. – So you could like,
do CrossFit with that. – They kind of crunch and it’s weird. You get this sweet, salty crunch in the middle of a piece of cheese. – This might be my favorite
of the three that I’ve had. It seems like it’s in between the two, like the last one was really mild, the first one was a little bolder. – Like a sexy old man, right? Like a George Clooney, so old, just the tiniest bit salty
where he used to be sweet. (laughs) He’s now a little salty. (Grace laughs) Well Grace, it’s been
great having you here. – Thank you for having me! – Thanks for joining. I appreciate you coming all this way. You have a podcast. – That is true, I do.
– Well, plug it. – Yeah okay, I have a
podcast called Not Too Deep. It comes up every Wednesday. I’m in a podcast with my
best friend Mamrie Hart, another content creator,
called This Might Get Weird. You guys have your Patreon. – We have a Patreon. Plug that on your own channel. – Bye! – Bye! I’m going to go shit my brains out now. – Okay!
(Keith laughs) All right, everybody’s going to be
farting and shitting forever. (sighs) This is really hard to say, but I’m starting to feel a little blue because the blue cheese is coming up next. – [Jason] Blue cheeses
are soft or semi-soft, and they’re injected with
penicillin roqueforti. It’s moldy cheese, punchy, salty. – Blue cheese is something
I haven’t had a lot lately, because it’s the one that
really fucks me up the most. – [Jason] Danablu. – It looks like a blueberry muffin. – [Jason] From Denmark. – Denmark! They love cheese and
they’re very happy people. Shout out to Denmark. Wow, it was so clean. Oh, my breath’s going to smell terrible. Wowza, that’s a good cheese! It is like, intense. Through my entire sinuses. It was almost like a
horseradish experience. (inhaling sharply) Bread, bread will tame it down. – [Jason] Put some honey on top. – Some honey, yay. Oh yeah, the honey makes it way better. It actually brings out
how salty the cheese is. Ooh! It’s like eating too many french fries. – [Jason] Caveman Blue. – From Oregon, oh shit! It smells very smoky and woody, kind of like a barbecue, yeah. That’s blue cheese that you
get on a black and blue salad from fucking Chili’s or something, but it’s better than the
Chili’s blue cheese, wow. Whoa, it’s changing! It’s like chewing on salty wood. Oh, that is so bizarre! Oh, oh, it changed again! What the fuck is this? What is happening? It fully changed flavors several times. Really salty, in my mouth. Oh my god, I’m salivating so much. – [Jason] Tastes like sour cream. – Tastes like sour cream and then somebody went to dash salt on it, and they just poured all of the salt they ever owned into this cheese. It is so salty. – Thank you.
– That was wild. – [Jason] Blauer Buffel. – Last cheese?
– From Switzerland. – From Switzerland, we’re
ending with Switzerland. – Yeah, buffalo milk.
– Buffalo milk! They have buffalo in Switzerland? I thought that was America’s cow. It all comes down to this. 26 cheeses on one tummy that hasn’t had much cheese at
all in the last eight years. (sniffing) (piano music) Hmm. I’m crying a little bit. It’s so sour, and salty, and unpleasant. Invasive, it stings my mouth. This cheese is just, it’s too much for me. It’s making me sad. I thought I would love all the cheeses. Maybe that’s why it is called blue cheese, because some people get really sad, because it hurts them and I
wanted to enjoy all the cheeses. I want to be the cheese master. It’s intense. Thank you very much.
– You’re very welcome. – And now it’s time for me to choose what I think is the best cheese, and what I think is the least best cheese. I think I can objectively say that my least favorite cheese today was the one that Kelsey Darragh and I had that was so pungent, it smelled only either like
fresh cat poop or the stuff that you scrape out from
under your toenails. It was too strong for me. I didn’t like it, but my favorite cheese was the marinated Meredith Dairy, the goat cheese in the jar. That was the best cheese, and also good news for
me, it’s goat cheese, which means I can actually eat it. What another incredible,
extravagant Eat the Menu. What else is out there? I’m down to do it.
(applauding) You only get one life and I’m
going to take mine. (laughs) Through food. See ya next time! (cheering) Bye, bye! Please Eat the Menu,
I’m Keith Habersberger! (energetic music) Try new cheeses, try new flavors. Let your tongue do a dance
and if it’s bad, guess what? There’s a lot of bad shit in
life, and you’ll get over it.


  • Reply Cassandra Calder November 17, 2019 at 3:46 am

    My ex was lactose intolerant and I'm Scottish and was eating some good Scottish cheese and he reached out to take some and like 3 people slapped his hand and was like no Jack no cheese for you. Now he lives somewhere, where cheese is put in random foods and like you know… Poor him.

  • Reply Kelly Mcsweeney November 17, 2019 at 4:21 am

    I just dislike Becky.

  • Reply Amber Moon November 17, 2019 at 6:38 am

    As a white bitch I can honestly say I don’t enjoy eating cheese by itself lol. It’s gotta be in something to be good

  • Reply Ally Diaz November 17, 2019 at 9:39 am

    Awe I love watching Kelsey being Kelsey ❤️❤️

  • Reply The man to scared to get a tattoo November 17, 2019 at 6:31 pm

    its my favorite buzzfeed alcoholic girl ~ 😀 havent seen her in a while since the eugene tries every drink video.

  • Reply delaney November 17, 2019 at 8:16 pm

    keith having the best time of his life for 26:44 minutes

  • Reply Fatima Zeshan November 17, 2019 at 8:20 pm

    “Depending on which kind of nerd you were.”

    How is no one talking about this?

  • Reply heyitsme_nae nae November 17, 2019 at 8:26 pm

    omg you can buy the meredith dairy marinated feta on amazon

  • Reply Shonny long Shlong November 18, 2019 at 1:22 am

    0.00 Keith’s got fkn BARS ???

  • Reply Rosy Ciella UwU November 18, 2019 at 4:26 am

    Keith: "Thank goodness I'm not pregnant!"

    Me: And thank goodness you haven't brought a pregnant guest.

  • Reply BlingBlingStarmie - November 18, 2019 at 12:00 pm

    i'd love for keith to try more good food, he's so happy 😀

  • Reply Alana Hann November 18, 2019 at 9:33 pm

    Why is every lactose intolerant person I know just like "CHEEEEEESE NOM NOM NOM" ?

  • Reply Alana Hann November 18, 2019 at 10:12 pm

    How come England gets its own special mention but Welsh cheese is just 'from the uk'. SNOWDONIA IS A WELSH MOUNTAIN BRUH. SCREW ENGLAND. WALES WALES WALES. WE'RE OUR OWN COUNTRYYYYYY
    Who says patriotism is Dead? We out here arguing over cheese

  • Reply Anna Bossaller November 19, 2019 at 11:52 pm

    There should’ve been more Italian cheeses

  • Reply sloaches lee November 20, 2019 at 12:34 am


  • Reply Mishiara November 20, 2019 at 1:04 am

    this is just straight up porn

  • Reply On The Move November 20, 2019 at 1:20 am

    Holy Cheesus

  • Reply BrandoIsThy November 20, 2019 at 5:41 am

    21:37 Thats what she said

  • Reply little guy gamer November 20, 2019 at 10:04 am

    Next is eating a entire cup of every Baskin Robbins flavor, and drinking milk between each bite.

  • Reply Idiot Eve November 20, 2019 at 6:38 pm

    I don’t know why but I can’t eat cheese, I’m not lactose intolerant but it gives me such a bad migraine, I feel like I’m missing out in life, every one of my friends say that I’m a kind of person who would be downstairs eating blocks of cheese at 4 am, yet I cannot. :/

  • Reply Joshua Ruault November 20, 2019 at 9:34 pm


  • Reply simplegirl265 November 21, 2019 at 2:43 am

    Keith descriptions sounds like Food Wars characters whenever they describe something they're eating

  • Reply elisabeth solorio November 21, 2019 at 6:26 am

    Is it just me or do Keith and Becky look like they would have the CUTEST KIDS AAAAAGHHHHH . ☺️

  • Reply otaku nation November 21, 2019 at 7:51 am

    I love this video so much I have to watch at least once a week lol

  • Reply PsychoKitty사랑 November 21, 2019 at 8:27 am

    I love cheese

  • Reply di butler November 21, 2019 at 9:18 pm

    I'm super lactose tolerant, (duhhh, I'm an Anglo), and I would eat ALL those muffugers except the cat poo cheese.

  • Reply Jacob Villalta November 22, 2019 at 5:57 am

    It’s so bad to watch this while your starving ?? I love cheese so much and I want to try all of these

  • Reply Lynn Kingery November 22, 2019 at 7:07 am

    Y'all calling it "sex cheese" kills any chance of it sounding appetizing. Just sounds like your trying to describe a collection of something in a fold ??

  • Reply Carl Pullin November 23, 2019 at 1:52 am

    red lobster Keith !!!!!!!!

  • Reply Grace Breaux November 23, 2019 at 4:18 am

    This feels like a ratatouille live action

  • Reply Karam Taza November 23, 2019 at 6:39 am

    i feel bad for the try guy office toilets

  • Reply Mao November 23, 2019 at 1:07 pm

    "They have buffalo in Switzerland? I thought that was America's cow" ???

  • Reply Hannah Cruse November 23, 2019 at 4:28 pm

    I shed real tears at how beautiful this cheese selection is

  • Reply Taryn Schmitz November 23, 2019 at 10:31 pm

    I love this episode and have now watched it 10 times in the span of a week

  • Reply Nia Nguyen November 24, 2019 at 12:50 am


  • Reply Jahannie Ayala November 24, 2019 at 2:34 pm

    The editing and his excitement are everything

  • Reply ghost girl November 24, 2019 at 3:00 pm

    Shout out to all the kids who never got to go to the bread place ?

  • Reply SchokiFan1122 November 24, 2019 at 4:23 pm

    Wtf am I doing here watching Keith eating cheese for half an hour ? I don't even eat cheese I am vegan ?

  • Reply max seals November 25, 2019 at 3:03 am

    Why does all the people in this video like toes and tolerance

  • Reply Samy Bialecki November 25, 2019 at 4:42 am

    i couldnt have been the only one who thought of that video where keith kept saying dainland when he ate the denmark cheese??

  • Reply Dahlia Legacy November 25, 2019 at 1:24 pm

    Goat and Guda are the fucking best, like Goat and Goda what else is there in life? Goat is that new tartness of sweet omg I can't and Guda is aged fireworks in your face…

  • Reply Park Chaeyoung November 25, 2019 at 5:06 pm

    25:26 you missed the chance to say “cheesus” ?

  • Reply KATIE FLAKE November 25, 2019 at 8:23 pm

    Kelsey chugging wine and cheese is 100% me

  • Reply Samantha Rojas November 26, 2019 at 1:10 am

    u should try all the different kinds of kit kat out there. japan alone has a numerous amount of flavors.

  • Reply Kaijah Brown November 26, 2019 at 11:24 pm

    I am now in the mood for cheese and I'm lactose intolerant

  • Reply W1ck3d Rav3n13 November 27, 2019 at 12:33 am

    how dare they not feature any cheese from the holy land of cheese…WISCONSIN!!!

  • Reply Antonio Wise November 27, 2019 at 1:59 am

    Woah woah woah…. Keith isnt gay???? Mind blown

  • Reply MusicWhovian56123 November 27, 2019 at 5:21 am

    Keith looks really good here!

  • Reply Yale Henry November 27, 2019 at 5:26 am

    I want cheese now

  • Reply SpoonCat November 27, 2019 at 11:54 pm

    Keith: My tongue is fucked up so I'm super sensitive to spice
    Also Keith: We used to just pour spices into our hands and eat them straight

  • Reply Andy Bosch November 28, 2019 at 12:45 am

    Netherland is THE cheeseland but why are there so less cheeses in the show??

  • Reply Andy Bosch November 28, 2019 at 12:46 am

    What about cheeses from Germany or Austria?

  • Reply Vanessa Benefico November 28, 2019 at 3:01 am

    I loooove cheese! Kerrygold is my go-to brand. Skellig and Dubliner are two favorites.

  • Reply Tardis Blue November 28, 2019 at 4:02 am

    I am… Very jealous… I could just sit with a cheese and bread plate with sparkling grape juice (alchohol makes me nausious… Brings back bad memories)

  • Reply Waltono Family November 28, 2019 at 10:17 am

    I like mine hard 😉

  • Reply Emil November 28, 2019 at 11:02 am

    I really hate cheese, so this entire video was like torture for my eyes

  • Reply Roblox Guidance Helper November 28, 2019 at 9:05 pm

    Keith handselected by a cheesemonger
    Me: bruh isn’t cheesemmonger a fake word
    Also me: nvm

  • Reply Hannibal Hannah November 28, 2019 at 10:10 pm

    Anyone else from the UK mad that there was only one British cheese

  • Reply [A_S_R] November 29, 2019 at 6:19 pm

    I like cheese

  • Reply bananabuttersomethin November 30, 2019 at 2:04 am

    Fun fact: Cheese that's been aged more than two months loses its lactose.

  • Reply angel November 30, 2019 at 2:05 am

    ᵘʰʰ ᵐʳ ˢᵗᵃʳᵏ ⁱ ᵈᵒⁿᵗ ᶠᵉᵉˡ ˢᵒ ᵍᵒᵒᵈ but me at my mom bc im lactose intolerant and ate too much dairy yay

  • Reply Lauren Colby November 30, 2019 at 7:20 am

    you need to do another one of these

  • Reply Mia Soda November 30, 2019 at 6:18 pm

    Rank King needs to rank these cheese

  • Reply Samantha Lindstrom December 1, 2019 at 2:08 am

    Today I walked into my Christmas decorating party and I found THE BREED

  • Reply TheJamesDHay December 1, 2019 at 2:43 am

    “Juice from a cow and vomit from bees” ?

  • Reply Michelle Rodriguez December 1, 2019 at 3:23 am

    "How does something smell hard?"

  • Reply MaddyOliv Draws December 1, 2019 at 5:10 am

    these videos make me hungry ?

  • Reply Hudson H December 1, 2019 at 5:12 am


  • Reply MaddyOliv Draws December 1, 2019 at 5:17 am

    me too

  • Reply Juliana Cantu December 1, 2019 at 8:49 am

    im abroad in an area with like NO CHEESE and ive watched this video about 5 times this week

  • Reply King Sakuya December 1, 2019 at 9:04 am

    I was actually waiting for Quinta ???

  • Reply Tedi Ysaol December 1, 2019 at 5:28 pm

    Kelsey made me love this

  • Reply Taryn Schmitz December 1, 2019 at 6:28 pm

    Think I have a problem… Still rewatching this like 20 times

  • Reply Eve Evans December 1, 2019 at 9:29 pm

    Basically I just watch this over and over.

  • Reply Jennifer Larkin December 1, 2019 at 9:50 pm

    people allergic go peanuts: i cant eat this ill die
    people allergic to gluten: i cant itll fuck up my body
    lactose intolerant people:

  • Reply Matthew Kehoe December 1, 2019 at 11:24 pm

    6:12 Keith becomes omniscient and sees god, the universe and all the cheeses that cannot compare.

  • Reply Katie Wharff December 1, 2019 at 11:55 pm

    Keith: shoutout to Denmark?
    Keith: from oregon!?
    Me: THAT'S ME RIGHT NOW!!!!!?

  • Reply Olivia Watkins December 2, 2019 at 4:41 am

    am i the only one who never EVER thought of putting jam on cheese

  • Reply walter kok December 2, 2019 at 6:29 am

    5:22 BRIE larson

  • Reply Maria Mora December 2, 2019 at 7:30 am

    did anyone else cringe when Keith ate the crust when he bit into the cheeses?

  • Reply Maxwell Anderson December 2, 2019 at 3:48 pm

    remarkable that keith actually said denmark and not daneland

  • Reply Buddar December 2, 2019 at 4:59 pm

    20:27 look at the way the guy rubs that cheese with a slight smirk. truly a sexy cheese.

  • Reply Michael Masoner December 2, 2019 at 7:41 pm

    This video sponsored by Lactaid “So you can poop again..”

  • Reply leah Johnson December 2, 2019 at 10:50 pm

    Keith's wife deff looks high

  • Reply Christmas Girl877 December 2, 2019 at 11:28 pm

    17:26… WHAT IS THAT SOUND?!?

  • Reply zoom zoom edits December 3, 2019 at 2:34 am

    When kelsie stuffed her face with the cheese I was like MEEE

  • Reply Lucy Mae Rob December 3, 2019 at 3:52 am

    I no longer feel so bad about eating such large quantities of cheese

  • Reply red_eyes 88 December 3, 2019 at 3:53 am

    Ive watched this video so many times

  • Reply video nocturnal December 3, 2019 at 6:52 am

    I'm 30 seconds in and my stomach already hurts for you

  • Reply Lexi Russell December 4, 2019 at 4:29 am

    "Depending on what kind of nerd you were"

  • Reply rosario llano December 4, 2019 at 6:02 am

    why does keith say semi like that

  • Reply Keene Chua December 4, 2019 at 6:24 am

    0:05 he made a pun… gooda cheese

  • Reply Lea Veri December 4, 2019 at 7:48 am


  • Reply Restaurio Restoria December 4, 2019 at 8:07 am

    Such a sensual sexy cheese man

  • Reply Ryuuucha December 4, 2019 at 10:50 am

    The title is kinda misleading, while he did eat 500$ worth of cheese, you also learn something about all them cheeses

  • Reply Random Dude December 4, 2019 at 11:22 am

    Green ranger: Am I a joke to you?

  • Reply bedo blonde December 4, 2019 at 4:20 pm

    Kelsey looks kinda off

  • Reply Kawaiidizoo December 4, 2019 at 5:46 pm

    heya denmark!!!!!!!!! thanks for the shoutout keith >w<

  • Reply martencedric December 4, 2019 at 7:36 pm

    KAASLUST not kaluft, gekoloniseerd tuig

  • Reply Isabelle December 5, 2019 at 3:29 am

    Keith with th 26th price of cheese, it's so sour and salty and unpleasant.
    Switzerland:WOW, just wow

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